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Why Does My Stepdad Hate Me?

Living in a family full of love is everyone’s wish. However, you can be unlucky to be in a family of hatred and jealousy. When this is your fate, there’s nothing much you can do but instead, look for survival tricks. If the hatred is from someone you believe should protect you, it can be heartbreaking, like your parents. If your stepdad hates you, living with him in the same house can be hell since he might not hide it. And at times force you into things you don’t love. Remember, feelings such as hatred have their cause, which you should be keen to note. Read along to know the reasons why your stepdad hates you.

Your Stepdad Is Jealous of You

If you realize that your stepdad hates you, it could because of jealousy. It might be that your mom treats you better than she does to him, causing hatred. Also, it can be that he never accepted you fully to be his child. So, this makes him angry anytime he sees you, and to cover it up, he’ll hate you for that. If your stepdad is jealous of you, he won’t be happy about your success. And many times, he will always make negative, discouraging comments to you. He can even refuse to associate with you out of jealousy and hatred. 

You Have a Bad Character That Stirs His Hate

Suppose you keep doing something your step dad dislikes; it can be a source of his hate. Especially if he’s told you he doesn’t like it. Maybe you’ve got a flawed character that’s harming your stepdad’s reputation, but you’re not willing to change. Or you don’t respect him at all, something he expects from your side since he’s like a real father. When he feels you can’t respect him or change your character, it will make him distrust you and hate you.

Your Stepdad Might Hate You as a Scapegoat

If your step dad struggles with something in his life, he might look for a way to make him feel better. Suppose he has an unresolved disagreement with your mum; it can also trigger his hate on you. He will use you as the cause of their fight and blame you for the wrong reasons. In this case, instead of your stepdad handling their difference, he will opt to harm you to hurt your mum. It could also be that your stepdad has personal problems that he doesn’t know how to solve. So, to make him feel better, he’ll project his anger on you, which in the long run can turn to be hate.

You’re a Threat to Your Stepdad

For your stepdad to hate you, it may be because he sees you as a threat. Your mum might be overprotecting you, making him feel like a lesser person in your life. When he feels useless in your life and doesn’t have a say regarding your upbringing, he’ll feel worthless. To him, you’ll be your mum’s main center of attention, threatening his position as her love. To counteract his threat, he’ll hate you and even try to do things that will kill your morale. 

Sometimes, he has his biological kids that he prefers over you, but you’re better than them. If you do better than them in academics or have outstanding achievements, it can double his hate towards you. To him, you’ll be a competitor of your other siblings threatening his future generation. So, to bring you down, he’ll hate you since he knows the power of hate on someone.

How Does Your Mum Treat or Regard You?

Sometimes your stepdad’s hatred comes from your mum. If she talks ill of you all the time to your stepdad, he will hate you. He will feel you’re making his wife suffer something he can’t tolerate. Remember, it’s your mum who is supposed to protect you from an abusive stepdad. But if she’s the one exposing your weakness, you’ll be in for it. Suppose your mum can’t protect you from him; he’ll take it to his advantage and hate you on her behalf. 


Your step dad should treat you as his child once he agrees to take your mum with him. Some accept the mother but not ready to face the challenges of being a stepdad, making him hate an innocent child. If this is your stepdad, you should understand his reasons for the hate. Then look for a solution since hatred can interfere with your self-esteem. Check if you’re the problem or if it’s your stepdad. Remember, your mum can contribute to the hatred but check on the issues, then pick on the best solution.

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