Depending on how you two relate, your mother-in-law can be your confidant and best friend. The bond between you two can extend to your kids. In the process, she might feel she owns your baby to the extent that she’ll want to stay close and monitor how you take care of your child. She might want to command you around on how to take care of the baby. Or correct you when she feels you’ve not done it the right way. And because she has a strong bond with your child, she will think that’s her baby and direct you whenever she feels.
Your mother-in-law commanding you on how to take care of your child and wanting to dominate their life can be suffocating. Kindly read along to know the tips you can use to handle your mother-in-law who thinks she owns your baby.
Ignore the Thoughts of Your Mother-in-Law
Your mother-in-law only thinks she owns your child. Probably she hasn’t told you more about it. The best thing you can do is ignore her even if she does things to show you what she means. Be busy with your life because she might be using the thought to trigger a fight. Your mother-in-law could correct you on something you know, but because old people are always “right,” do it her way. Alternatively, you can pretend not to be hearing what she’s saying about the grandkid because that’s her main interest.
Tell Your Spouse to Talk to Her About Your Concerns
Obviously, no mother-in-law can take the daughter-in-law’s advice seriously, so it’s wise to send a third party. If you feel uncomfortable about your mother-in-law, thoughts talk to your husband, to go and tell her how you feel. For your mother-in-law to think she owns your child, it means there’s something you don’t do. To solve the problem, let her son talk to her. Your hubby should tell her to give you space as you’re still learning to be a good mother.
Allow Your Mother-in-Law to Spend Some Time with Your Child
You can’t change the fact that your mother-in-law thinks she owns your child. For this reason, give her some time to bond, especially if she thinks she owns your baby out of love. Allow them to spend the weekends together to catch up. Giving them their time will create space for her to do all she wishes for your kid. All she used to command you to do when it’s your turn to take care of the kid she can now do them. Suppose you leave together with your mother-in-law and give her some hours a day. The chance will enable her to fully own your child and do for them whatever she pleases without hurting you.
Give Your Mother-in-Law Time to Overcome Her Obsessions
For your mother-in-law to think she owns your baby, it could be they have a strong bond between them. Your mother-in-law will want you to take care of the person she adores in her own style. Forcing her way on you will result in the commands and rules you hate. Please don’t argue with her. Instead, give her time and space to outgrow the obsession. Don’t forget to appreciate her for her concern towards your child. Understand that all the corrections you get are for the grandchild’s sake.
Don’t Follow Her Rules but Stick to Your Ground
If your mother-in-law thinks she owns your baby, she’ll expect you to do as she pleases. Some of the things she could be recommending you to do for the baby might be outdated or not reasonable enough. Suppose she suggests you feed or lay your baby in a manner that is not safe; don’t do them. Kindly tell her your pediatrician gave you a warning against such practices. You can alternatively give her a listening ear but do that which you believe is right. Your mother-in-law will, with time, see her pestering and advice fall on deaf ears and stop owning your baby.
Your mother-in-law, thinking that she owns your child, isn’t bad because they are one blood. But be careful. She can turn the love into an obsession forcing her to rule you on how to take care of your own baby. To help both of you and have a peaceful co-existence, ignore her thoughts, or let time decide your fate. You can also allow her to take care of your baby for some time or rather stick with your beliefs.