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My Baby’s Father Is Verbally Abusive!

    Parents need to understand that their words have power. Whether we’re talking to our partners or our children, choosing our words carefully is important.

    Does your spouse often get angry and use hurtful words? Their outbursts may be more abusive than you realize.

    What is verbal or emotional abuse?

    Verbal abuse occurs when one person negatively attacks another using their words or silence.

    Verbal abuse isn’t always easy to recognize. It can take the form of passive-aggressive remarks to screaming matches. As such, many partners mistake verbal abuse for someone’s personality. However, if your partner’s behavior leaves you feeling depressed, hurt, or worthless, this is a sign of abuse.

    While verbal abuse may not have any lasting physical effects, it can be just as hurtful. It’s important to take action if abuse is happening in your home.

    It’s not just you being verbally abused, even indirectly.

    Verbal abuse can happen in any relationship but is especially damaging for children.

    Verbal abuse isn’t always easy to recognize or combat. While it makes sense to try to reason with the abuser, this won’t work.

    What’s the most effective way to end verbal abuse? Call out your abuser. Identifying their statements as abuse allows the abuser to recognize what they’re doing.

    If your child experiences abuse as well, it’s important to take swift action. Hearing hurtful words from their parent can be incredibly painful. This type of verbal abuse can cause lasting emotional and mental damage to your child.

    If you can leave, it’s important to do so. Waiting for an abuser to change their behavior puts you and your child in a dangerous situation. Leaving this environment as soon as possible will give you and your child the breathing room you need to create a safe space free of emotional abuse.

    Can my child see their verbally abusive father?

    Verbal abuse can often be the beginning of a cycle of lifelong abuse. If your baby’s father is already exhibiting these abusive behaviors, it isn’t wise to wait to see what happens.

    Trying to parent with an abusive partner is child endangerment. While the abusive parent can and should seek help, it isn’t wise to reunite them with their children too soon.

    In many cases of abuse, the abusive parent loses full custody of their child. Often, this parent won’t even be able to speak to them. If your baby’s father is willing to seek help for their verbal abuse, they may eventually receive supervised visitation.

    Do what is best for you and your children in this situation. If seeing your ex again will trigger PTSD or other unwanted feelings, it may be best to avoid meeting.

    What happens after verbal abuse?

    Emotional abuse may not leave physical scars, but the emotional wounds are real. If you or your children experience emotional abuse, it’s time to heal. After you end the cycle of abuse and leave the abusive relationship, healing can begin.

    Many victims of verbal abuse have a warped sense of self-worth and frequently suffer from anxiety. Other symptoms of abuse include PTSD, flashbacks, nightmares, helplessness, and similar feelings.

    These types of experiences can stunt your child’s growth and make it difficult for you to move on. Understand that you deserve a chance to heal from your trauma.

    How can I heal from verbal abuse?

    By intentionally working through the damage of this verbal and emotional abuse, you’ll be able to heal. Start by acknowledging the past abuse and decide to put yourself and your family first. Working with a licensed therapist will help you reclaim your identity again as a mom and a woman.

    Escaping verbal abuse is not only possible: it’s necessary. Make sure you and your child are safe by choosing to leave an emotionally abusive environment and partner for good.

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