What if your baby likes your mother more than you? If this is true, do not be discouraged.
You shouldn’t let this discourage you because you have to remember that your mother raised you at some point. And if you know that your mother was a great mom to you, then your baby is in the best hands.
Your baby’s happiness is what matters the most. Also, just because your baby may have a liking more towards your mother and to you doesn’t mean your baby doesn’t love you.
The connection your baby has with each, and every family member is always going to be different from the connection they have with you. How much time they spend with your baby also should also be taken into consideration.
If grandma is over the house every single day watching over your baby while you’re at work, of course, they are going to develop a sacred bond. There is no fighting it. But what you need to remember is that you are always going to have a special bond with your baby.
You spent 9 months carrying your baby in your womb. Once you’ve done that, you were already destined to have had a special bond with your baby.
And that’s something nobody can ever take away from you. Also, keep in mind that it doesn’t get much better than having your child in the care of a family member that you know is reliable, loving, and caring.
Mothers are alike
You have to remember that children often love their mother’s mother. Throughout history, most mothers have a tendency to leave their children with their grandparents. Either because they don’t trust an actual sitter or because they want someone who their baby is familiar with.
But sometimes, when your baby spends so much time with the grandparent, they eventually form their own genuine connection.
It’s completely normal, so do not feel sad or not good enough. And you must keep in mind that your baby’s connection to the grandparent can be a good thing.
Whether it’s your mother or your spouse’s mother, they were once in your position. So with them being experienced, they are just as important to your baby as you are.
Don’t be jealous
Yes, it can be annoying if your baby gets along with grandma more than they seem to do with you. But, do not let that affect your relationship with your baby.
Besides, maybe the reason why your baby could be getting along so well with your mother is that your mother reminds your baby of you.
There is a chance your baby can detect the familiarity. So in retrospect, that’s a compliment towards you.
Your baby can love your mother so much just because she’s so much like you. The only difference is that she’s an older version of you. And someday, when you become a grandparent, your grandchildren might end up forming a connection with you.
Don’t beat yourself up
Sometimes it can be scary knowing that your baby has formed a connection with someone else. But do not beat yourself up about it. Because doing that will only cause more stress on you.
Some mothers tend to be sensitive about this topic because they fear that their baby might forget who their mother is. But don’t worry.
Your baby will know you are their mom. And if you are not satisfied and want to grow closer with your baby, you can still do that.
Listed below are some things you can do to grow closer to baby:
- Take your baby everywhere you go
- Get a baby carrier (babywearing is a great bonding tool)
- Narrate your voice to your baby
- Talk to your baby about everything that you do
Ease your ego
Do not feel threatened every time your child runs up to their grandmother and gives them hugs and kisses. I know it’s hard to watch, but you have to put your ego aside for your baby.
Because your baby’s happiness is the most important, also, make sure you don’t let your personal feelings get in the way of the relationship between your child and their grandmother.
Because it’s common to hold grudges and act out on them as well, just keep reminding yourself that your baby loves you and that you are always going to be their mother.
If your child’s relationship with their grandmother bothers you to the point where you feel like you have to speak on it, then you can do that. Because sometimes intentions aren’t aligned as you believe they should be.
And if it’s a continuing issue, then you have to put your foot down. Stand up to what you feel is right.
Make it clear to her that you raise your child the way you want to, regardless of what she thinks. You don’t want to turn this into a competition so make sure she understands.
The best thing to do in a situation like this is to remember that your baby will always love you. It may be not easy at first, but start to appreciate the relationship your baby has with their grandmother.
Despite your personal feelings, your baby loves their grandmother as well. Your baby’s attachment to its grandmother only implies that they are incapable, loving hands. Understand that parenting isn’t always about you.
Your baby has a relationship with their grandmother, and that’s all that matters because some babies don’t even get the opportunity to have relationships with their grandparents.
If you feel your ego rising again, make sure you constantly remind yourself that your baby loves you and, more importantly, that you will always be your baby’s mother. Remember that this is a process. So it’s going to take time adjusting to everything.