It can be a bit discouraging when your child seems to be lacking the attachment that you feel he or she should have to you. You probably have told yourself that it will get better, and you’re overthinking it and that it doesn’t exist. It is all in your head. The truth is that some babies do lack attachment to their mothers. It is sad for mothers, but there is no reason to take it to heart, there are many ways that you can further engage your child. This issue is fixable. You can build an attachment between you and your child. With and little time and effort, you will be on your way with developing that stronger attachment that you would like your child to have for you. Try these five tips to help with the attachment issues.
1. Talk to Your Baby Often
Talking to your baby is key to many things. It can help fuel the learning process. It will help your baby feel secure. Talking is most important in teaching your child trust and learning verbal cues. When you want to build an attachment with your child, that is a major portion of breaking that barrier. You have to be able to communicate effectively and efficiently. To do that, you start with simple talking. Since you are dealing with a child, it comes with the way that you say words and the tone of your voice. Your child knows the sound of your voice from the womb. You can build trust by finding ways to talk to them when you are out of sight. Give them a call when you have to be away for long periods.
2. Play Lap Games With Your Baby
Lap games provide the closeness that your baby needs to build an attachment with you. You must sit close and touch. Hug your baby when they sing along or do hand movements. Do not hesitate to reward me with kisses. Repetition will build a bond between the two of you, securing a place for where it is expected that you guys will do this often. If you do some of the same things often, then the attachment will grow because your baby will expect these things from you.
3. Create Routines Just Between You Two
There is no better way to create an attachment than to make sure that you and your baby have things that you do together that only you two do. That makes it special. It doesn’t have to be anything completely elaborate, but special to the two of you. Each night before bed, you can be the last person to tuck him in. In the mornings, you can say a silly sweet saying to wake her. It could even be something as simple as watching a television show together every evening. Whatever it is, make it yours and don’t share it. Make sure that it is yours. Don’t forget it. Don’t put it off for another day. You will find that those little will build not only healthy attachments but friendships and you will love it.
4. Make a Special Playlist
Music fuels relationships of all kinds, so there are no questions as to why it wouldn’t do the same for a child/parent relationship. Find your favorite songs that make you “Get down with your bad selves” and compile it in a playlist. Play it often and have a ton of dance parties. Put the world on pause as you play your songs and have a great time bonding. Be sure to laugh a bunch and dance even more. Your child will love the time spent just having fun. It will be a no-judgment zone for your “mom moves” or the way that either of you dances offbeat. The point will be to enjoy each other’s company and get comfortable with just being around one another so that you look forward to that time again and again.
5. Hugs, Hugs, Hugs
I guess children need hugs. They need hugs for a large array of reasons. They need hugs to fuel their self-esteem and to make them feel loved/comfortable within close distances of people. This is also true for some children when it comes to the closeness of their parents. You have to build those attachments with you.
Not all children will remember that closeness from the womb or be able to make the connection. This is when those hugs and massages will come in handy. You have to make physical connections with your child so that later in life, it will not throw them off if someone would like to hug them. If you find that your child doesn’t even adjust to hugging or physical touching, then you may need to follow up with a physician for assessment to see if there is another reason for that.
It may feel overwhelming at first, but it will get better as you begin to see the progress. When you finally see your baby bonding and making those connections to you, and only you, you will be thrilled. The attachment that the following tips spark in you and your baby’s relationship will leave you extremely excited. If you allow yourself to do these things, you will build a lifetime of trust and friendship for you and your child. You deserve it, and so does your little one, so give it a try.