When you head in for that 20-week ultrasound, you might find yourself overly excited to find out the gender of your baby. Sure, you could get this information earlier with a blood test, but typically the Ultrasound Technician can give you a gender guess at the halfway mark. (https://www.babycenter.com/0_when-and-how-can-i-find-out-my-babys-sex_20004784.bc).
The debate about finding out the gender of your baby before birth is one that many couples have. Many women say they want to know the gender ahead of time so they can plan better for the baby, use the correct pronouns, and give their current children a heads up.
All of these are valid reasons to learn if you are having a girl or boy, but waiting to learn the sex can make the pregnancy and birth experience even more intriguing and exciting as you have this big unknown to anticipate once the baby arrives.
Before you let the Ultrasound Technician clue you into if you are having a boy or a girl, and before you plan your gender reveal party, consider these seven reasons not to find out the sex of your baby.
It is a great surprise at delivery.
With pregnancy and birth being events, you can prepare for and learn all the potential details of knowing the gender of your baby is not. As you go through birth, you not only have an end goal of getting the baby out but of finally learning if you are having a boy or a girl. That surprise alone should give you enough motivation to push through the worst of it.
You can also work it into your birth plan on who gets to announce the baby’s gender: your partner, the doctor, or someone else in the room with you. Just think about what a special moment that would be for everyone involved and what an incredible memory that would create.
There is more anticipation for friends and family.
Your friends and family are likely to have a harder time waiting to know the gender of your baby than you are. They want to buy all the cute pink frilly items and all the adorable collared shirts and khakis. While it can frustrate them not to know, it does add an extra element of surprise and fun to keep your family and friends on the surprise ending too.
Just be sure you clarify with them that you truly do not know the sex. Some of them might think you know it but are just keeping it to yourself.
In addition to having your family in on the gender surprise, your loved ones will not be giving you unsolicited advice about how hard boys are at a young age versus how hard girls are at that preteen age. You just get to enjoy their excitement about a new person joining the family.
You will get better clothes and decor.
If your baby shower guests know the gender of your baby, then prepare yourself for lots of pinks or blues. If they do not know the gender, then you are in for some more creative gifts and cuter clothes. Plus, you might end up with less clothing and some more interesting baby shower presents than just gendered clothes.
This goes the same for decor in the nursery. Skip the typical pink or blue walls and go with neutral yellows and greens. It makes that room way more versatile and a bit softer of space to spend time in (https://www.thespruce.com/best-places-to-buy-nursery-decor-online-4583942)
It becomes easier to focus on your health.
Instead of getting caught up in the gender planning and worries for the new baby and speculating what the baby will be like, you can focus on your health throughout the pregnancy. You are going to have a baby no matter what, so concentrating on eating nutritious foods, drinking plenty of water, and getting regular exercise up to delivery can take priority. This is one of the best reasons not to find out the sex of your baby because you can simply focus on growing a healthy human and taking care of yourself in the process.
You are not limited to one name.
Not knowing the gender of your child ahead of birth means you are going to have to pick out two names: one for each gender. This could spark a ton of fun conversations between you and your partner as well as between you and any other children you have.
With two names ready to go, you can hang onto the name you do not use for your next child.
You can dive into the old wives’ tales.
There are so many tricks and experiments you can try to determine the gender of your baby. Some include if you gain weight in your face it is a girl, if the heartbeat is above 140 beats per minute it is a girl, and the direction a dangling ring swings over your belly button (https://www.webmd.com/baby/features/predicting-baby-gender#2).
With all of these fun ways to determine your baby’s gender, you could make a whole party surrounding trying them out instead of doing the generic gender reveal.
There is zero disappointment.
Most soon to be moms who opt not to find out the sex of their baby would be truly happy with either gender. Their focus is on birthing a happy, healthy child and experiencing pregnancy, birth, and mom life in a more simple way.
If you do have your heart set on a specific gender, then these reasons for not finding out the sex of your baby are not going to help you recover from any disappointment you may feel. Only you can determine if not knowing the sex of your child will leave you feeling crazy or calm.
Keeping the gender a surprise will also affect your partner, so be sure you are making this decision not to find out the sex of your baby together.
Whatever you and your partner decide to do, enjoy this time being pregnant and the fun of anticipating meeting your new little family member.