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My Wife Thinks Our Baby Hates Her

    The early days of your baby’s life are full of emotional and physical fortitude. Both the child and the parent have a lot to learn about each other. This is especially for mothers who are raising a child for the first time. Caring for a delicate person whose communication is only physical, for instance, by crying is tricky. In case the baby fails to respond to the effort you are putting in, you get frustrated and feel like they hate you.

    Additionally, it is frustrating if the child seems to cry when you are around them. For this reason, you may hear your wife complaining that your baby hates her. One of the reasons why she sees it this way is because she is dealing with postnatal depression. On the other hand, she may feel guilty of something she did or didn’t do to make the child hate her. Read on to understand why your wife feels this way and how you can help her.  

    What Is Postnatal Depression?

    As the name suggests, postnatal depression is the depression that one may deal with after child delivery. This depression may affect both fathers and mothers but is most common to mothers. Postnatal depression may begin a few weeks after birth and continue up to one year after birth. The leading causes of postnatal depression are the physical, social, and chemical changes that the mother undergoes after giving birth. The combination of excitement, fear, joy, and anxiety may result in depression. If your wife is suffering from postnatal depression, you may hear them complain that your baby hates her.

    Symptoms of Postnatal Depression

    If your wife is dealing with postnatal depression that makes her think the baby hates her, she will have other low mood symptoms. Additionally, she will withdraw from people, have trouble concentrating and lose interest in almost everything. Postnatal depression will also cause difficulty when dealing with the baby, so they feel like the baby hates them. The condition develops gradually. Most women may not realize that they have it, especially in the early stages; therefore, if you realize these and other signs from your wife after giving birth, support and help her deal with the depression.

    Treatment for Postnatal Depression and When to See a Doctor

    Ideally, postnatal depression heals on its own even without medical help. However, one will need to follow some self-help activities like talking to your friends and family about your feelings. Additionally, get enough rest and spend time doing what you love. Some depression levels will need you to seek medical help. For instance, if it is hard for your wife to take care of the baby or complete daily tasks, it is time to seek help. The new mum should also visit a specialist if this depression persists for over two weeks.

    Thoughts of harming herself or the baby and being extremely scared and anxious are also signs that you should seek professional help.

    Administering medications like antidepressants is one way to treat postnatal depression. One can also schedule counseling and psychotherapy sessions. Additionally, advise her to join support groups and share with other mothers dealing with postnatal depression.

    Other Reasons Why a Mother May Think Their Baby Hates Them

    It is possible for a mother to feel like their child hates them even if they have not given birth. Some of the reason which make her feel guilty and like the baby hates them are:

    They Argued

    From time to time, you are likely to end up in an argument with your child if they annoy you. The way you handle the situation like canning and correcting them will make the child annoyed at you too. Therefore, mothers may feel like the child hates them if they are still annoyed after some time.

    The Child Does Not Obey Her

    Nothing frustrates a mother more than seeing that their child rarely or never obeys them. This is especially if the child has no problem obeying other people, for instance, their dad. The mother will often take this to mean that the child hates them but loves others.

    The Baby Always Cries When Around Her

    When a mother holds her baby, they expect them to smile and brighten their face. For this reason, if the baby cries when the mother holds them, the mother may think that she is hated. She may also avoid holding the baby to keep them from crying.


    When your wife thinks that your baby hates her, most likely she is depressed. Take care of the situation and walk her through it until she changes her perspective. Additionally, convince her that the baby does not hold any grudge, and they shall have great moments together soon.

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