My Brother-in-Law Controls My Sister

A controlling person often uses intimidation tactics and will attempt to undermine your self-esteem by blaming you for things past your control. Sometimes, a controlling person can blame you for something that you know nothing about. Most people with a controlling and manipulative character always play the victim card and will shift all the blame to you.

If your brother-in-law controls your sister, it may be that your sister’s husband has a controlling personality. This controlling behavior is likely to be seen in other areas of your brother-in-law’s life, like, friends, strangers, and co-workers.

Is It Normal for Your Brother-in-Law to Control Your Sister?

It is usual for your husband to want to control situations in your home. However, it is not normal for your husband to be unreasonably jealous and to continually manipulate you into changing your mind. 

A controlling husband will not accept to go your way and will always demand undivided attention. It is not ordinary if your husband can not accept a negative response from you once in a while. This behavior cannot be termed as normal if the manipulation and control become unbearable to you.

It is unusual for you to have to carefully watch every move so as not to offend your husband. It is abnormal when you find it difficult to differentiate right from wrong when dealing with your husband. This can be so if your husband only sees the negative part of you and continuously finds faults in what you do.

 It is not typical If your husband never says sorry even when the fault is clearly not your own. More so, if the position of your relationship with your controlling husband is not clear, how can this be normal?

A Brother-in-Law Who Controls Your Sister Shifts Blame

A controlling brother-in-law will find fault in minor things your sister does. Every time your sister’s husband plays the blame game, your sibling ends up feeling small, humiliated, or embarrassed in public.

A controlling person will hardly take the blame for any wrongdoing. Your brother-in-law will pin all fault on your sister for either doing or not doing what caused the problem. This can leave your sister feeling confused and not know how to respond for fear of being intimidated by your brother-in-law.

Your Brother-in-Law Who Controls Your Sister Is Hypercritical

A controlling person will exaggerate your weaknesses and flaws at work or in a home setting. Your brother-in-law will pointedly make fun of and undermine your sister’s confidence in private or public. This can make your sister be withdrawn and lose conviction in making sound judgment.

Your sister’s husband can also criticize your sister on anything, including dressing, conversation, or cooking. A controlling person will not acknowledge when you do something correctly.

A Brother-in-Law Who Controls Your Sister Can Do Weird Things

A manipulative and controlling husband will try to change you to suit specific personal interests. Your brother-in-law can want to alter your sister’s dress code and even friendships. While you are away, a controlling husband can even throw out clothes and items that do not suit personal interests.

Your brother-in-law can even restrict your sister’s movement and phone calls. A controlling husband will speak negatively about you and your friends.  A husband who controls you will go through your phone and interrogate you about where you go and the people you see.

Worrisome Signs if Your Brother-in-Law Is Controlling Your Sister

A controlling person can sometimes exhibit abusive behavior.  If your sister feels trapped, subjected, and anxious all the time, it may be that your brother-in-law is manipulative and controlling. It is worrisome if your sister’s freedoms are being restricted.

If your sister’s romantic relationship feels unsafe and your sibling begins to lose self-worth, the situation may need looking into. Feeling free is vital in a loving relationship, and if you lose your self-esteem and your identity to a controlling husband, you may need to seek expert help.


People with a controlling personality trait are overly manipulative and will often leave you feeling small and disgraced.  A controlling person will hardly take responsibility for any wrongdoing but will always find ways to blame you for it.

However, if your brother-in-law controls your sister, you can help your sibling gain self-esteem by being supportive. Manipulative people will mock your weaknesses and work hard to intimidate your strengths. You can gain control of your life by owning your strengths and weaknesses. Being aware of who you are, makes you confident of your strengths, no matter what a controlling person may say.